This is a week late, but…

Happy New Year!

I’ve been incredibly busy and overwhelmed the past few weeks — so much so that I have eschewed Facebook (gasp), Google Reader (the horror!), and even blogging.

I still have a busy week ahead, but I hope to get back to my regularly scheduled programming within the next two weeks.

2009 was an incredibly difficult year for myself and my family. There were so many instances that made me question why bad things keep happening to good people (ie, my parents).

I once read that it takes a significant emotional event to change a person. I feel that the traumatic events of 2009 — losing a baby 4 months into my pregnancy, utmost betrayal from those I’ve trusted, among others — have really changed me as a person. I have become jaded, despondent, and testy. I find it difficult to be happy for others, selfishly wondering why I am expected to be happy for others’ blessing when so many of my brightest hopes were taken away from me and those whom I care about deeply.

These changes are not all for the worse, however. I am now better able to stand up for myself, to say “no” when asked to place others’ happiness before mine. Sounds selfish, doesn’t it? In a way it is, but you have no idea how refreshing this is after 29 years of being the ultimate people-pleaser. I am also now a better negotiator and problem-solver than ever before, which helps tremendously in helping my parents with their business.

But perhaps the best change comes with my taking things slower and appreciating the little things in life. Waking up every morning between my two favorite boys (my husband and my dog). The crisp winter air. Checking off an item on my to-do list. Taking some time out each day to be thankful for what I do have.

2009 was a year filled with much drama and many tears. I do not have any new year resolutions, but I do have one wish: to have a boring, albeit happy year in 2010…

…however, I’m not so sure how feasible a boring year would be, seeing as my biggest desire is to get pregnant as soon as possible and go on to have a healthy baby.

I remain hopeful.