Aug 20, 2013  •  In Aerin, Motherhood, Parenting, Personal

An Update on Aerin

Yesterday, we had our final meeting with the Early Intervention (EI) evaluation and placement team. They recommended that Aerin meet with a developmental interventionist twice a week, and a speech therapist twice a month.

I became rather upset after this meeting. Not because they were saying Aerin is delayed and needs therapy (I have accepted this after the first meeting), but because their evaluation seemed inaccurate after further examination.

When I looked over the initial evaluation carefully (I hadn’t seen the scores they had assigned for each skill, and didn’t receive a copy of the full evaluation until last week), I noticed that they had scored Aerin lower than they should have. Now, I’m sure some of you are wondering if I’m being biased. But I recall our evaluation very well — it was only 3 weeks ago — and there are some skills they did not test her on, ask us about, or even mention, that they just marked as a “future learning objective.”

(The test was based on the Battelle Developmental Inventory, which consists of a checklist of milestones and skills. Each skill is to be categorized into one of three categories: mastered, emerging, and future learning objective.)

2013-08-20-12-07-14_deco
Aerin’s current favorite toy is this Ariel doll. She carries it around EVERYWHERE.

There were also some skills that I specifically remember our discussing, that they marked in a lower category. For example, they marked “Expresses ownership or possession” as a future learning objective when I thought we had declared it a mastered skill.

Additionally, there were times when it seemed like they wouldn’t take my word. When they asked if Aerin could identify herself in a mirror, I responded absolutely — she’s been doing this for a long time, and always runs to the closet door mirror whenever we put a new hair pin, hat, or clothes on her. But then they brought out a small, compact mirror and showed it to Aerin. She took a look, smiled at her reflection, and walked away. I saw that they had marked this skill as “emerging” when it was obvious to me that she prefers the large, bright mirror with which she’s familiar over a small mirror held by a stranger.

Some skills just seemed unfair, like how they scored Aerin low for not being able to walk up and down stairs by herself. She crawls up and down stairs because she’s little (under the 10th percentile for both height and weight) and her short legs make it practically impossible for her to walk!

Then there’s her vocabulary. When we did our initial evaluation, they asked me how many words Aerin knew, and I answered 10. They asked which words. Being put on the spot like like that, I could only recall 6 of those 10 words (I only started keeping a list after this meeting), and 6 was the the number they used in the final evaluation.

During our meeting yesterday, I told them that the number of words and 2-word phrases she knows has more than doubled since the evaluation (she knows more than 20 now). I went on to clarify that I only count a word/phrase if she regularly uses them, and I know for certain that she knows the meaning behind them….and they said that I should also count the ones she says once in a while too.

What? So not only was the first number they recorded incorrect, both numbers should definitely be higher too. But they didn’t seem concerned about this at all, and made no note of it.

9068_10151639698459039_1225803113_n
“Wake up, unnie!”

A friend wondered if the EI evaluators had purposely scored Aerin lower so that she could qualify for more services (which isn’t necessarily a bad thing, and they may believe that every child needs all the help that they can get), and/or in order to help us qualify for insurance. I can certainly understand the first theory, but the second does not seem true, as they’re the ones who told us about the state’s family cost participation program, and went on to inform us that this would be more affordable for us than insurance.

And this is where my cynical, suspicious side comes in. I discovered that the state of New Jersey outsources its EI program. Meaning, they will ask outside parties to do the evaluations and therapy sessions, then reimburse them accordingly. So there’s a possibility that these companies intentionally score kids a bit lower so that they can make more money.

Am I being overly skeptical and paranoid? Perhaps.

J also questioned the accuracy of the first evaluation by pointing out that kids like Aerin, who are shy and weary of strangers, are naturally less likely to interact with people they don’t know well. Which is a valid point, especially seeing that they started the evaluation almost immediately after they walked through the door and it lasted only an hour. I remember that a few times during our evaluation, Aerin refused to do certain things I knew that she could do and does regularly. But when I pointed this out to the evaluators, they just smiled and marked the skill as “emerging” or “future learning objective” on their checklist.

Nonetheless, J and I have decided to go ahead with the therapy sessions. They can’t hurt (aside from our wallets), and I think interacting with other adults on a regular basis will help Aerin out of her shell. I also know that they can teach me a lot of things about child development too, and I would be grateful for the help.

IMG_20130810_105957

Aerin has made tremendous progress in the past few weeks alone — not only has her vocabulary surged, but she’s also picking things up faster than ever, following directions, and more. Based on this alone, I can’t help but agree with J and my parents that she’s delayed (most likely due to her illness a few months back, because she was on track with everything before she got sick) but will catch up soon enough.

To be completely honest, my mommy instincts are telling me that she does not need therapy. But, like I said above, they can’t hurt. And if it turns out that my instincts were wrong, I will be glad to have given Aerin the extra help.

Right now my biggest concern is how I will juggle Claire’s preschool and Aerin’s therapy sessions, both of which will begin at about the same time. I guess I can see this as an early start to the years of extracurricular activities that lie ahead of us?

As for the possibility of autism, I am not too concerned about that anymore because of all the progress she’s made lately. Besides, both our pediatrician and the EI people told us that they prefer to test kids after they’re able to talk more. (And when I asked our doctor about the possibility of a long wait for a developmental pediatrician, he said his patients have never had to wait long after a referral.)

I should also mention that we have an appointment with a pediatric ENT physician this Friday. We want to get Aerin’s hearing checked by a specialist, just in case.

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Aug 20, 2013  •  In Art/Design, Entertainment, Movies

Famous Shoes

“Famous Shoes” is a collection that depicts the iconic footwear of celebrities and well-known fictional characters. I have cropped 10 of my favorites below — can you guess which shoe belongs to which person/character? (Click on the shoe to see the full version, and the answer.)

Continue reading »

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Aug 19, 2013  •  In Geek, Reviews, Web

How I Fixed My Netflix Streaming Problems Using OpenDNS

Starting a couple of weeks ago, I began to run into Netflix streaming issues. Movies would take forever to load, and when they finally did, they would start lagging after just a few minutes.

I then realized that this only happened between the hours of 9pm-11pm.

I knew that there weren’t any programs or processes running on our end that may contribute to this issue. And as someone who doesn’t have cable, regularly using Netflix to unwind at the end of a long day, I got pretty annoyed.

I began to suspect that either our ISP or Netflix itself was throttling our connection. After all, we, as a family, use the web extensively and always have multiple devices connected at a time. Additionally, the hours between 9pm and 11pm are when we use the most bandwidth with streaming, downloading, and other internet activity after the kids are in bed.

The thought that this is also the time when many other people in our area, particularly in our condo building where most of the residents are in our age group and use the same ISP, are actively online did cross my mind. However, other internet activities didn’t seem to suffer — just Netflix.

So I decided to give OpenDNS a try. (It’s free!) If I saw that it wasn’t making a difference, I could easily stop using it. But if Netflix streaming were to improve, I would know that I was successfully bypassing my throttled internet connection with the help of OpenDNS.

opendns

My suspicions were correct! As soon as I enabled OpenDNS’ IP addresses in my network configuration, it was like a switch had been flipped and Netflix started working fine again.

I also liked that OpenDNS comes with added security for our internet connection. And when the kids get older, we can enable parental controls too!

I would highly suggest you check out OpenDNS if you’re experiencing similar problems. Once again, it’s FREE and there’s no obligation. Setup is easy-peasy and I can’t believe I haven’t used this before!

(You can alternatively use Google’s Public DNS service if you prefer.)

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Aug 18, 2013  •  In Blogging, Personal, Reviews, Web

An Unfortunate Series of Events [Hawk Host Review]

ETA, March 2015:
I am now hosting this site with Squidix, and have been very happy with their service. You can read a full review here.


Short version: my site was down for 45 hours this weekend due to Hawk Host’s abysmal support. Because I was well within their “30-day money back guarantee” period, I have changed hosts…again.

(I know there are those who don’t care about this topic, so please feel free stop reading at this point.)

Now, for the long version…

When researching web hosts, I read the following:

Most of the ‘good’ web hosting providers work fine & pretty much same. The quality of support is only tested in special circumstances. However, if you are just a regular user running a blog, everything should just go smoothly (provided there are no major network outages, DDoS attacks, frequent server changes etc.)

Now, this post isn’t meant to bash Hawk Host. Because before my “special circumstances” occurred, I was very happy with them.

It was only when shit happened, that it proceeded to hit the fan as well.

As noted in my earlier post, I was on one of Hawk Host’s semi-dedicated plans. Which means better performance as long as I stay within my plan’s limit.

Well, this blog received some unexpected traffic last week. And by “some” I mean “holy crap can my server handle this?” kind of traffic.

I soon began to receive notifications that I was about to hit my bandwidth limit. Since I didn’t want my site to go down, I upgraded to a higher plan. Here is a timeline of events that transpired afterwards (and I have the emails to prove it):

Thursday, 8/15/2013

10:07 AM:
I upgrade my plan.

12:58 PM:
I see, via cPanel, that the upgrade still hadn’t been applied to my account. I send an email to support asking why, but I never receive a response.

Friday, 8/16/2013

6:12 PM:
I receive another notification that I am dangerously close to hitting my bandwidth limit, so I email support once again, asking for an update. I receive no response.

10:03 PM:
My bandwidth limit has been reached. My site goes down.

10:58 PM:
I open a new ticket with the above information.

11:10 PM:
I receive an email that says they are moving the ticket to the billing department. (Huh? This is not a billing issue!)

11:14 PM:
I receive the following canned response: “This ticket has been flagged for review. We’ll get back to you with an update as soon as possible.”

Saturday, 8/17/2013

3:46 PM:
I email them again (notice the time…this is 14 hours later!) and ask for an update.

8:46 PM:
I send them the following: “My site has been down for almost 24 hours now and I still have not received any updates or responses. I am also confused as to why this was relegated to the billing department when it is clearly a technical issue? Needless to say, I am VERY disappointed with Hawk Host and I have decided to take my business elsewhere once the data transfer is complete.”

Sunday, 8/18/2013

1:54 AM:
I receive the same canned response: “This ticket has been flagged for review. We’ll get back to you with an update as soon as possible.”

And that was the last time I heard back from them. As of this writing (8:54pm on Sunday night), I still have not heard back.

So what are the special circumstances surrounding this case? Well, for one, this all happened over a weekend, when support times are bound to be slow. There’s also the fact that my tickets got transferred between technical support and billing, so some confusion may have occurred.

I should also mention that when I was upgrading my plan, I mistakenly created two invoices for the upgrade, so my account still shows that I have one unpaid invoice. (But then again, I did ask to have it removed as soon as I created the duplicate invoice.) Perhaps they think that I’m just a disgruntled, unpaying customer?

Maybe they’re swamped with new customers. I know that a lot of people have left HostGator and Bluehost over the past few months, and I’m sure that Hawk Host is a popular choice.

bad_customer_service
This viral image seems appropriate, given my situation.

Despite these concessions, I was still displeased enough with Hawk Host’s support to jump ship. Luckily, I had already done the bulk of my research, so I only had to decide between MDDHosting and Stable Host. I was leaning toward Stable Host at first because they’re cheaper, but I ultimately went with MDDHosting for their superb customer support. They’re very active within their own support forums, social media sites, and the Web Hosting Talk community. I mean, just look at this post! What other hosting company would create a new WordPress blog in order to try to reproduce one customer’s issues? I also remembered how, when I was first researching new web hosts, MDDHosting was always the first to answer my pre-sales questions.

And so far, I’m very happy with MDDHosting. 🙂

Again, this post is not meant to bash Hawk Host. Would I recommend their services to others? Probably. After all, most people won’t run into the types of issues I encountered (where a bunch of things just happened to occur at the same time to make matters more difficult and complex), and I know for a fact that Hawk Host still remains in good standing with the great majority of its customers and the Web Hosting Talk community.

If you’re still reading, thanks for sticking by. I know that the majority of my readers won’t really care, but if even one person finds this review helpful, I think my taking the time out to write this all out would have been worth it.

I’m just happy that my site is back up again. (For most people; my nameservers haven’t propagated worldwide yet.)

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Aug 15, 2013  •  In Blogging, Personal, Web

When Bloggers Can’t Win

A recent commenter asked me, “If you are so confident in what you have written, why are you responding to each critical comment?”

The post in question was a controversial one with numerous commenters up in arms about what I had chosen to share. I considered my options. If I respond, people like her would think that I’m being defensive. If I don’t respond, someone will inevitably chime up and say that I’m acting high-and-mighty by ignoring helpful statements.

It was, as the title of this post suggests, a no-win situation.

That was one example. Here’s another.

offend
(image source)

Last year, I sought to implement a blogging schedule. One of the topics I regularly wrote about was my faith. And it’s funny, because I never, in all my years of blogging — not even when I wrote for über-popular Weddingbee — received so much heartfelt, appreciative feedback. (And I still receive emails!)

Now, I know that not all my readers are Christian. And although I made it clear at the beginning of each post that they are more than welcome to ignore what I had written, some decided to read on. A portion of these non-believing readers spoke up to question and/or outright disagree with my points.

Which was totally fine. Besides, that isn’t the point of the story.

Because the positive feedback greatly outweighed the bad, I didn’t think too many people minded those posts. Only later, when I found this blog being discussed in an outside forum, did I discover that a great number of my readers (or at least the participants in this discussion made it seem so) hated it when I talked religion. Some said they were planning on, or had already unsubscribed for this reason.

What is a blogger to do in this situation?

cant_please_everyone
(image source)

I want to give one last example.

I have a friend whose blog focuses on beauty and fashion. When she got pregnant, she decided to share the news with her readers…and soon her blog began to feature pregnancy and baby-related articles along with her usual stuff on clothes and makeup.

She ended up losing a lot of readers, the sole reason being that her life, and priorities in life had taken a shift. And it wasn’t like the main focus of her blog was no longer beauty and fashion. Sometimes, she would even merge her new interests with the new (e.g., maternity fashion).

The good news is that she gained some new followers as a result of the change. But her stats remain lower than her pre-baby days, and I know that this bothers her a bit because her blog means a lot to her.

Babies aren’t the only life-changing events in bloggers’ lives. New jobs, new living situations….heck, even new interests and hobbies are almost guaranteed to bring changes to a blog. And sadly, not every reader will like those changes.

Perhaps this is why large, niche blogs with multiple authors who can continue to contribute fresh content within the same niche tend to be more successful, with greater longevity?

But even those will have its detractors. Someone will not like author X. Another will find topic Y offensive. The site unveils a redesign and the comments section will light up with 153 people who like the new look, and 147 who believe it to be the ugliest thing they’ve seen on the web that day.

In other words, bloggers can’t win. At least not in the please-everybody sense.

I was going to say something about how people can be assholes online, and reference Mary-Louise Parker’s departure from acting due to said internet assholes, when I came across this little piece of gem while googling Ms. Parker:

If you put anything interesting or meaningful out into the world, people are going to criticize it — and you — because many human beings are bitter and small, and social media enables them to join up and be collectively horrible together, like a tsunami of dicks. It’s rough. But it’s only so rough as you allow it to be. 

It reminded me of this quote, attributed to Ed Sheeran: “I can’t tell you the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone.”

Wise words, indeed.

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Aug 13, 2013  •  In Blogging, Personal

Please Stand By…

I know I’ve been blabbering on about my recent web host transfer and related maintenance issues, and that most people reading won’t even care.

But.

Yesterday, a parenting Facebook group linked to one of my old, more controversial posts. Which led to tons of new visitors. Which led to more people linking to that same post from other parenting boards (like GBCN, which is apparently a message board for former Nesties). Which led to even more traffic from angry parents who didn’t agree with my parenting choices.

In simple terms, this blog received a whooping 172,616 hits yesterday. (And the stats continue to stay higher-than-normal today.)

My new web hosting account received a total of 381 (as of this writing) 508 “Resource Limit Is Reached” errors with this additional traffic, and my blog is acting up again.

When I decided to move to Hawk Host, I was torn between two plans, because my stats lie just below the limits of the cheaper plan. I decided to go with the cheaper with the rationale that my traffic has remained pretty steady for a while and I couldn’t see any foreseeable increases in the near future.

I’m still on the fence about upgrading my hosting plan. I may just wait out the wave of additional traffic, as most of the new visitors will likely never return.

In the meantime, I apologize if you’re seeing errors and/or experiencing slow loading times on this site.

And just in case you’ve read this through and are now sitting there going, “Well, that was a waste of 2 minutes,” here’s something to make up for it:

game_of_thrones_characters_as_memes
(via C-Section Comics)

Have a great day!

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Aug 9, 2013  •  In Blogging, Cute, Funny, Web

This Will Be the Best 11 Minutes and 38 Seconds of Your Day

I’m still working on some back-end stuff for the blog post-transition, so posts will continue to stay light through the weekend. But before I go, I wanted to share two things —

First, a compilation video of some of the best 2013 Vines so far. I know that at 11+ minutes, it’s longer than your average “I want to waste some time online” YouTube video, but I guarantee it’s worth it!

Next, I wanted to remind you that today is the last day to enter my It Can Wait giveaway. Have you entered yet? You can win a BlackBerry Q10, contract-free!

I hope you all have a wonderful weekend!


ETA:
It seems that the original video was taken down by a copyright troll, and will remain inaccessible while YouTube looks into the issue. The good news is that a version of the video without the clip in question has been released in its place. 🙂  I’ve replaced the original with the new in the video embed up above. It’s now 6 seconds shorter, but just as good. Enjoy!

ETA, even later:
Well that one got taken down too. Here’s another from an obscure YouTube account (which is 1 second shorter than the original). Let’s see how long this stays up.

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Aug 8, 2013  •  In Blogging, Personal, Reviews, Web

Buh-Bye, HostGator! Hello, Hawk Host!

You may have noticed that this blog was down this past Friday. In fact, you may have noticed that a bunch of sites were down that day, and I’ll tell you why.

When I first switched to HostGator, everything was fine and dandy. HostGator is was known to be one of the very few RELIABLE web hosts with affordable “UNLIMITED!” shared hosting plans.

But in the past few months, I started noticing more lagging and time-outs. There were even a few downtimes, and then…

My entire site went kablooie for almost 12 freakin hours Friday.

As luck would have it, I happened to schedule my biggest giveaway of the year to be published this exact day. (Have you entered yet? The prize pack is worth $600!)

I immediately tried to submit a support ticket…and was met by a notice that the HostGator servers were experiencing issues. What sort of issues? How long would it last? To get some answers, I turned to HostGator’s Twitter feed, Facebook Page, and forums.

What I learned wasn’t pretty.

You see, HostGator was acquired by a large company called EIG last year. EIG owns and operates some of the biggest names in web hosting. (See here for a list.) And they do NOT have a good track record. What usually ends up happening is:

A fast, reliable web hosting company gets popular

EIG buys them

EIG oversells and overloads the servers, usually while switching to cheaper datacenters

Web hosting company gets crappy
(slow transfer speeds, downtimes, slow/lack of support)

Do you have a website on Bluehost, HostMonster, or JustHost? If so, your site was probably down Friday too, because EIG owns them all (Bluehost, probably the most popular of them all and used by many of my blogging friends, was acquired earlier this year) and they have their datacenters in Provo where the blowout occurred.

I was so glad the last contract I signed with HostGator was only for 3 months, because absorbing this new information made me want to get the hell outta dodge.

Finding a new webhost is no easy task, because there are about a gazillion websites out there that post fake or no-substance reviews in exchange for affiliate links. So as much as I hate the search function on most online forums, I decided to turn to the definitive source for web hosting discussions: WebHostingTalk.com.

After hours of research (luckily, my mother was over to help with the girls), I narrowed down my choices to the following three:

Hawk Host

MDDHosting

StableHost

The above are all affiliate links, but you know my stance on those…I will never endorse anything I don’t believe to be great and beneficial to my readers.

My situation was a bit unique in that although I had tried a VPS in the past, I’m too lazy and time-strapped for the upkeep and maintenance (the high costs weren’t helping either). But at the same time, this blog has clearly outgrown typical shared hosting environments. So I decided to narrow my search to the best business/enterprise/semi-dedicated hosting services.

And during my extensive search, three names kept reappearing: Hawk Host, MDDHosting, and StableHost. Many people agree that you can’t really go wrong with them. (Do they have their detractors and negative reviews? Yes. But what company doesn’t?)

I shot all three of them messages with some preliminary questions. While MDDHosting was always the fastest (I always received a response within minutes), I loved the fact that the freakin’ CEO of Hawk Host took time to reply to one of my pre-sales related questions.

Also, it was the cheapest of the three. They’re running some crazy deals right now!

I know that most people won’t care about this post, but I wanted to write it for my fellow bloggers. Please check to see if your web host is on this list of EIG-owned companies. Even if it isn’t, I would advise you to Google “[your web host] and EIG” to see if its parent or sister company is owned by EIG.

(This happened to another host I had in mind when I first found out about HostGator. It’s not on the Wikipedia list, but its sister company is, and by association, it’s owned by EIG. Searching for it on WebHostingTalk.com confirmed that its service has really gone downhill in the past year.)

And if your web host is owned by EIG? I would highly recommend that you look for an alternate host. The three I mentioned above have great shared hosting plans too, and I know that StableHost in particular gets recommended regularly for shared hosting plans. (And just in case you’re wondering, i don’t get a higher commission for StableHost.)

As for me, I’m very satisfied with Hawk Host so far. It’s been less than 24 hours, but they helped me migrate everything to their servers and the only problems we encountered were on HostGator’s end. Their communication is superb, and, best of all, my site is so much faster!


ETA, a few hours later:
Okay, so it’s official…the difference in speed is phenomenal! At least, in the back end — each WordPress admin page used to take a few seconds to load, but now it’s a fraction of a second!

(I still need to configure caching and minify some files to speed up the user end.)

I used to think that it was just WordPress being slow to load, but now it’s clear that the problem stemmed from my host. It’s like my eyes have opened! Seriously, guys. Wow. Just wow.


ETA, a couple of weeks later:
Due to an unfortunate series of events, I have switched from Hawk Host to MDDHosting. I still recommend Hawk Host, but if you would like to see why I have decided to move on to MDDHosting, you can read my full review here.


ETA, March 2015:
I am now hosting this site with Squidix, and have been very happy with their service. You can read a full review here.

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Aug 7, 2013  •  In Art/Design, Entertainment, Science

The Character Elements of Breaking Bad

There have been so many life-changing, and potentially life-changing events going on lately that I’ve been one big ball of emotions. I’ve even taken a pregnancy test because I can’t remember being this emotional and not being pregnant! (And no, I’m not pregnant.)

Additionally, this blog is currently in the process of moving to a new web host. (More on why in a later post.) This has been going on since Friday — 5 days ago! — but my old host is being a dick and making the migration process as slow as possible. And I don’t have the time or energy to fight them. So please bear with me as the transfer continues.

But wait! My It Can Wait giveaway, featuring a prize pack worth $600(!), is still underway. Have you entered yet?

And, to celebrate the return, and mourn the beginning of the end of Breaking Bad, I wanted to share with you these pieces from Shutterstock, where stock artwork from various artists are used to create Bad Chemistry: The Character Elements of Breaking Bad. While I don’t exactly agree with all the analyses (e.g., I don’t think Skyler is that innocent), you can see that some of them are supposed to be humorous generalizations (see: Walt Jr.). Enjoy!

breaking_bad_character_chemistry_1

breaking_bad_character_chemistry_2

breaking_bad_character_chemistry_3

Continue reading »

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Aug 3, 2013  •  In Art/Design

Former Walmart Transformed into a Modern Library

When most people look at 124,500 square feet of abandoned warehouse space, they probably see nothing more than the establishment it once contained — a Walmart, in this case.

But when the architecture firm of Meyer, Scherer & Rockcastle saw the building, they saw potential.

Take a look at these stunning photos from the end product. The McAllen Main Library (of McAllen, TX) is not only functional — with separate community and meeting rooms, a space dedicated to computers, and a staff area — but beautiful as well. The design is clean and modern, yet warm and inviting at the same time. It is a library built for today.

walmart_turned_library_1

walmart_turned_library_2

walmart_turned_library_3

Continue reading »

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