Dear Baby,

I had a minor scare last night when I couldn’t find your heartbeat immediately on the fetal doppler. I had forgotten to check that you were still doing okay in my tummy before I left for Homecoming…and I was worried that the weekend’s festivities (in addition to being around all those smokers!) had somehow killed you.

But after some fumbling around, I found it. It was stronger and louder than ever. Thuh thump. Thuh thump. Thuh thump. This is seriously the most beautiful sound to me these days. I have been trying to get a video of it for this blog, but you always move away before I can get a good clip!

You are now 15 weeks along, or the size of an orange or an apple. They say that some women have already started to feel their babies by this point, but I have yet to feel anything.

You continue to breathe amniotic fluid through your nose and upper respiratory tract, which aids in developing the air sacs in your tiny lungs. Your heart is now pumping about 25 quarts of blood per day! (This will increase to 200 quarts by the time you come out.)

Your legs are now longer than your arms. Baby, I pray that you get your father’s height and long limbs…please don’t take after your short mom with her stumpy arms and legs! You eyelids are still fused shut, but you can now sense light. BabyCenter says that if I shine a flashlight at my belly, you will turn away. I’m tempted to experiment but I’ll contain myself.

Other little milestones include scalp pattern on your head (although hair has yet to grow in), and the formation of taste buds!

They say that starting this week, experts will be able to tell your sex with a greater certainty. Sometimes I am tempted to cajole your father into forking over an extra few hundred bucks for an elective 3D/4D ultrasound, so we can find out your sex early and get a detailed picture of what you look like. But he’s already disagreed, and I can see how that money can be spent better elsewhere.

I was pretty sure that you are a boy, but starting last week I have been less certain. I feel like everyone’s putting great pressure on me to have a boy, and although the sex of a baby is determined by the man’s sperm, it is still not uncommon in Asian cultures to “blame” the woman for having a girl.

With all this being said, baby, you know that I will love you equally regardless of your sex. I already love you so much, and that love grows stronger every day. Please continue to stay healthy and strong…and I wish nothing but the best for you!